upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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