so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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