Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
we made out on top of his cat.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
