YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
