I'm lost and stupid without you.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
