you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
