this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
