Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize