come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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