Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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