so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
