I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
