I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
