OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Randomize
