Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
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