No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
