Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
