That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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