Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Randomize