Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
