5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
