I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
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