I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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