there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
