Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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