They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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