he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
