I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Randomize