Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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