he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
