Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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