Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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