all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
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