Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
