Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize