Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
