Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
