...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize