Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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