Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize