just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
