i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
