She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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