your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
