Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I woke up under a house in Key West
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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