My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
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