My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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