I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize