Life is so much better after having sex.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize