Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Randomize
