It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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